The Mostest Happiest

A lot can happen in 6 months...

...the Earth takes half a turn around the Sun.
...a Baboon can have one baby from conception to birth.
...a Mouse can have 10 pregnancies.
...Subway grosses 222,000.00$.
...your heart can literally grow two sizes too big.

Okay, that last one might not be scientifically true, but this is my blog so I can state whatever fact I want, and I'm saying a heart can grow! A lot has changed in my life in the last six months. I went from being simply content to exceedingly happy. I learned to keep secrets...well, kinda sorta. I woke up to a beautiful 4th of July morning. I had wonderful conversation at a Bees game in July. I enjoyed the Schmidt reunion more this year. I catered a wedding where the least stressful thing were the cupcakes. I gave some foot rubs and got some back. I learned a lot about football. I came to love the Squaw Peak lookout. I went to a doctor appointment without anxiety because I wasn't alone. Zupas is now my favorite place for multiple reasons. Even if you get poked in the eye it can still be an amazing time.

And flowers can make me smile so much my cheeks hurt.

Softy at Heart

Tonight I read some of my past posts lately, and I realized I am a very sappy girl. Some of what I post may not make sense to anyone but me, but most of what I post is dripping in sweet. And guess what, I don't even care! I post what I need to write, and lately I need to write about good things in my life, so, to who ever might be reading my blog, sorry not sorry for the sappiness. I love it.

I need to write about my day:

1-I hate Spanish. I love my time at BYU, but each semester I fill up 4 credits with Spanish. The BYU English department is one of the best English programs in the Nation, and I am filling my semester up with lo/le/se/le when I could be taking Adolescent Literature from Christopher Crowe or learning about post-modern American literature, but, alas, I am learning about the difference between alli and alla.

2-I get all nervous with goodbyes. Whether it is one day or one month, I get all emotionless and just rush through it. After, I regret it and wish I would have given one last hug or smile. #sociallyinept

3-Ah, finances. I did some math today. Shocking, I know! I've been to 12 semesters of school, 50 months of rent, and 4 literature Anthologies. Let's work this out.

12 semesters X 2,300 tuition=27,600

50 months X 300 avg rent-15,000

12 semesters X 200 books=2,400

GRAND TOTAL= 45,000$

I am so grateful that I go to a private school that charges a small fraction of what other private school charge. Also, I am grateful I have a roof over my head, heat in the winter and, well, windows that open in the summer. And I love my books more than I love most people. With that being said, I should be grateful that I've only had to take out a small amount in student loans in order to get where I am. If I could do that math, I would tell you the percentage, but I can't, so we'll just round it a small digit that I should be grateful for instead of crying about. It could be so much worse.

4-Toothpase rubbed on headlights clears them up. For reals. Check it out.

 

5-I'm dying from a cold. In the past six hours it has mass multiplied and will probably turn into strep or broken bones or amputated arms. I'm not even exaggerating.

6-I busted out 4 big assignments tonight. That's an achievement that, if my dad were here, would say deserved a ribbon if he had one.

7-I miss the gym.

8-Google rules the world. Did any of you know that the ads that show up on webpages can be linked to what you searched in google? Well, it can. :)

9-One thing Idaho doesn't see much of: Taxis and Limos


10-I am a mix of emotions: excited and nervous, sad and worried, but mostly just happy. Very, very happy to be so blessed in so many ways.

Some Nights

Some nights I realize my life is so very good.

I got a poem tonight, and it was better than any gift I've ever received.

Some nights, I wish I could just sit and smile because my dreams aren't as good as reality.

Because lately I've been dreaming about Zombies....

No Sad Bunnies Today!

Shots and Cats

I feel abnormally stressed lately, and it needs to stop. One, I am afraid of getting wrinkles. B, people my age get grey hair now; that needs to not happen as well. Three, worrying is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do, but it gets you nowhere.

I have MS. I mean, I have it have it. For the last year and half I have been 70% diagnosed, and in my mind I took that to mean I didn't really have it, and that it would go away eventually. I was all prepared last week to go in to my neuro's office and be cured from this non-curable disease purely because I was stubborn enough to think I could prove science wrong. The exact opposite happened. In fact, that 70% became a full blown 100%. I was okay with it at first, but then reality sunk in, and I realized these shots are for the rest of my life. I could take the little buggers because during my nightly ritual of face washing, reading, last minute texts and a shot, I thought about the time when I would slice off that last part and go to bed happy and comfortable. Well, that's not true anymore and it is hard when the only solid plan for your future is a damned shot.

Which brings me to another worrisome area. My mom says I have a smile that gets captured in pictures every once in awhile. She calls it my real smile. The real smile, according to her, is in my eyes where she can see me in two little blue dots. I was a good child. In fact, I was my mom's best child for obviously, non-biased reasons. I may have bit Dayna a time or two...or a lot, or hid toys in the hall closet instead of walking them the ten feet further to my room. But, I do know I could entertain myself for hours at the end of some meadow field while my dad slowly chugged away in a tractor--the rythmic cha chu, cha chu, cha chu of the tractor was my summer time theme song. I loved any type of water, perferably one with fish, frogs or bugs to watch. I loved the haystack with all it's catacomb tunnels and holes that, like pandora's box, just had to be explored! That was me and how I grew up. If I saw some bug or cavern of hay I wanted to know about, I went and found out about it. That's a little harder to do nowadays. I just like to know things. I don't need to know facts and figures, but just things. That is the me my mom sees in those pictures. I'm curious, and I like to know things.

Balance is necessary, and right now, the only for sure thing in my life are these little glass syringes, and I hate that, but curiosity did kill that cat.